Recently discovered buried in one of the Easter Island hills, an ancient head awaits transplantation to the Mount Rushmore National Memorial in South Dakota. Intense research (aided by late night psychotropics) has determined that it is the bust of a popular chieftan of the late 1600's, Willau Smythe. Willau was a sailor on the HMS Ripper, a coal ship blown off course during its travels between England and Scotland. Although well-liked by the rest of the crew, he was set adrift because he didn't swear enough. Legend has it that sea eagles led Smythe to the island, where the Rapa Nui, recognizing a man blessed by the gods, adopted him as their tribal leader.
photo from the Radio Paradise studio cam, provided by face